Halal" Dating ? What Does Islam Say About It?
What are the rules to have a "halal relationship"?
Islam was sent for the whole of humanity and thus addressed all matters under all situations at any time in considerable detail
Many Muslims want to get to know their potential spouse and curious about boundaries, dating has become a culture with more profound meaning and ideas in society. In most cultures, dating involves an intimate relationship such as holding hands, kissing, touching, sex, etc.
Islam taught us that the “dating” styles above do not apply to Muslims. These dating styles above are about unlawful sexual intercourse in Islam and could be a marriage without parents’ blessing. In the Quran surah, Al Isra verse 32 mentions avoiding that behavior.
“And do not approach adultery; (adultery) is really a heinous act and a bad way.” (QS 17:32)
So while touching or being alone with the opposite sex is strictly forbidden, many Muslims may be surprised at how much IS allowed.
While there is no such thing in “dating” when finding expose in Islam, as this is a western and has western connotations, there are definitely realistic and successful ways to get to know a potential spouse.
What is allowed and important to explore?
We teach this in EVEN GREATER DETAIL HERE.
1. One of the most important things to know is that desires matter (as in psychological emotional and physical). A Muslim must want to marry the potential brother and is allowed to determine if she is attracted to him as that is important
2. A Muslimah can ask any appropriate question she would like in order to determine if they are compatible. what we typically find is that sisters unfortunately don’t as either the RIGHT QUESTIONS OR ENOUGH QUESTIONS. That is why we give away the top 15 questions to ask a spouse in our free marriage class.(you can get access to the 15 questions and free class here).
3. Can meet with him as many times as she needs in order to determine if a potential guy is right for her (as long as her Wali is present). We suggest multiple meetings, to get to know the family and exposing herself to real marital scenarios of meeting (even negative ones can be beneficial) in order to determine true family dynamics.
4. Every Muslimah has right and ability to set terms that she feels comfortable with within her contract. Mentioning non-negotiables related to work, school, and living are very important to clarify early on.
5. She can set her own mahr and one may have a right to it (not even her parents) except for her.
Here are some points you need to consider before you consider taking a step towards marriage.
1. Good Commitment
An exemplary commitment comes from the young man who wants to find his Muslim wife. They both have an outstanding obligation that their dating always keeps on Islamic rules. For example, while they go on a date, someone other than them should accompany their date. In the Quran surah, Al Maidah verse 5 mentions that Muslims should keep maintaining their honor until marriage time.
“… And (it is permissible for you to marry) women who maintain the honor of women who believe and women who maintain the honor of those who are given the book before you, if you pay their dowry to marry her, not with the intention of adultery and not to make domestic women…” (QS 5:5)
2. Avoid a Secret Relationship
Even though your dating is halal dating, it does not mean you are allowed to keep it secret. It not only will harm you but also does not apply in Islamic dating rule. That is why, you need to tell your parents, friends, or family members that you’re dating someone in a halal way. In the Quran surah Al Baqarah verse 235 mentions that:
“And there is no sin for you to propose those women with innuendo or you hide (your desire) in your heart. God knows that you will mention them. But don’t make an agreement (to get married) with them in secret, except to say good words. And do not you set a marriage contract, before the end of his birthday? Know that God knows what is in your heart, so fear Him. And know that Allah is Forgiving, Most Gracious.” (QS 2:235)
3. Keep Focused
It is easy to get swept up emotionally in a guy, keeping logical at all times is key. One of the biggest mistakes Muslimah make is feeling for a guy in missing on straight-up ignoring red flags If you want to learn how to spot them then join our free class here. 4. Maintain Your Genital The point of halal dating is to avoid adultery. Islam taught us that adultery is forbidden. That is why every Muslim needs to keep maintain their genital among the people except their spouse as the importance of virginity in Islam. In the Quran surah, Al Ma’arij verses 29-30 mentions that:
“and those who care for their genitals, except for their wives or slaves they have, they are indeed not blameworthy.” (QS 70: 29-30)
5.Put Your Trust in Allah Only
For some people, halal dating may not be their thing and feel awkward to look at. But, instead of worrying about what people taught in your relationship, keeping doing a good deed is more important to do. Besides, Allah loves those who keep their way in an Islamic way and put their trust in Allah only. May Allah bless you to get some ways on how to get husband love in Islam. For them who believed, in the Quran surah Ar-Rum verse 21 mentions that:
“And among His signs (greatness) is that He created pairs for you of your own kind so that you can use peaceful tents, and He makes among you gratitude and love. Really, in that, there really are signs (the greatness of God) for people who think.” (QS 30:21)
For further information on how to find a spouse in Islam including what questions to ask, then save your seat to access our free information on Muslim marriage here
Conclusion
Ask Allah for guidance when you doubt, and be prepared to trust and obey Him.
Allah loves us, and He does not want our downfall in life. He may not give us what we seek because He knows our truest desire’s negative and positive results.
Sometimes it could be a “No” or “Not now”; keep that in mind with patience as you seek guidance from Him alone.
Don’t forget Quran chapter 3 verse 159, which says: “…when you have taken a decision, put your trust in Allah, certainly, Allah loves those who put their trust (in Him).
WHAT’S NEXT?: Access our Free marriage class.
